July 14-18, 2000
The old man of the mountain is back again. Let me begin with the wildlife studies. Even as I write, a large bushy tail squirrel is crowding around in the manzanita bush on the edge of the deck. He is eating the berries. Just down the slope a chipmunk is crawling around in another bush eating the berries. I woke up very late today at 9:00 and it is already pretty warm. The squirrel in the bush is a neighborhood guy. I was having my afternoon snooze and was awakened by a thumping and bumping, this old boy was running around in the house. When I moved he ran off. I thought I would be nice and give him a treat so I put some chips on the floor by the door. He ate them and ran away, cute.
Give some people an inch and they take a mile. I went down to the “resort” to get water for the shower and shoot the breeze and get the local gossip (nothing worth repeating) Coe wants to sell their place and will make anyone a good deal. In order to build any new places a “septic system” must be in place. Tootie wahs are no more. A septic system entails water, a lot of water. Be calm, we are grandfathered in. The guys building over at ???, across the gulch → ODIN was here on the weekend working on their new house. I didn’t know about the septic tanks until yesterday so I didn’t get first hand poop (no pun intended).
Yesterday I girded my loins and screwed my courage to the sticking place. I did this strange stuff to prepare myself for a trip through the park fence into Terra Incognita (or should I say Terror Incognita) since I got lost in there it has been a scary place.
But I was prepared this time. I took my scissors which I carry everywhere (even to foreign lands, you can ask Uncle Roland about this) and I cut small strips from grocery bags and put them in my pocket then at places along the trail I tied them to branches and twigs. The old Hansel and Gretel trick. This worked nicely until I came to this old saw mill. It was almost vanished into the forest.
Anyway, I felt very secure, so I thought I would go to the waterfalls. Cheri, or friend is a photographer and she would love those falls. So I went on. Well, at length I got thirsty and hungry. I didn’t have my sherpa with me who carries my water and my lunch and my sunblock so I thought I would go back. I have had water problems in the past too. So I started back and guess what?? I damn near got lost again. I went up the wrong gulley. U didn’t see my breadcrumbs but then I realized I didn’t so I turned around right then. I went back. Sure enough, I had missed a turn. Anyway, I got out ok. Then I took a new trail out from the fence, down through the old water hole.
I was mooching along and I heard a rustling in the leaves. I thought it was maybe a mouse or something. It was something all right, it was a timber rattler. 20 18 9 6 feet long with uncountable rattles. It just oozed along giving me a little rattle just to keep me alert. I have never observed a huge rattlesnake before and I was 15 feet away so I thought I’d watch awhile. Well, he very slowly and gracefully curled himself up into a coil with his tail up on top with the rattles tinkling and his tiny evil looking head looking right at me. I don’t know all that much about rattlesnakes. All coiled up like that he may be able to spring a long ways. I felt that I had observed enough and came home. Later on my way to the toilet (really?) I saw a rock next to the house I didn’t remember seeing before. It was not a rock, it was a rattlesnake, much smaller than the big daddy but plenty scary. I was going to shoo it away because I go up that path to the toilet many times every day (really?) So I was poking at it with the shovel. It was the longest stick I could find and the dumb thing charged me.
Instead of running or slithering away like a sensible snake, it headed right for me – fast. I panicked and whacked it with the shovel and cut it in half. (alas)
I felt terrible. I don’t kill things anymore. As we know snakes cannot die before sundown, so the poor thing wiggled and thrashed for a long time. That night, long after the rising of the moon, I had to go to the toilet (really?) and when I went out one half of the snake was missing. No mistake, the moon was bright as day. The missing end was the rattling end so I wasn’t too scared. This morning I looked all over, gone. Maybe some sort of predator came by and ate it. I saw no tracks because of the gravel. I will bury the head far away.
Going back to the squirrel story (I got so engrossed in the gossip that I forgot) while I was off gossiping that naughty squirrel came in an helped himself to the candy kisses that the girls had left on a a basket on the table. He ate as many as he wanted and left a big mess.
He is no longer welcome. He has come in twice and been shooed off. Another squirrel story. When I was sitting on the toilet (really? Is there a pattern here?) this morning and I heard a terrible ruckus. Two little squirrels were playing a fun game. They were chasing one another round and round a big tree then they leaped a huge distance maybe 10 feet to another tree and then down on the ground running, up a tree, jump a mile. It looked like a lot of fun. They were smaller than the local boys with a black stripe on their back and a black tail. They may have been just babies of the local population.
The best story is for last. It is a turkey story. After dinner, the first night I was here I was on the chaise reading and I heard a sound that I had heard before. The beating of large wings. I was up like a shot. The turkeys have roosted before in the snags behind the cabin in the gulley, so I ran over to look there first. No turkeys. More beating wings, not so loud.
Out the back door looking sort of east are many tall trees. I saw mama turkey and one at a time, three babies land in the tree and jump around and squawk (they didn’t see me) and get comfortable. Then one more big turkey — Dad I guess —came in but mama and the little ones huddled together up high & Daddy stayed down lower by himself. In case something climbed the tree he could peck it in the head (well maybe).
On the day I went hiking I was taking off my boots on the deck and a BIG old turkey came down the Turkey Road, which is down the driveway in front of the swing and down the old zip line trail into the gully. Turkeys have little tiny heads. I know they are mega smart but not much cranial capacity.
I think Jenny should be allowed to have her friends here as often as she wants. The place was spotless and neat. Maybe a little too neat. Uncle Jim could not find the shower. He got a little panicky and I think he even said the very bad word he is ashamed to say. But he knew that his beloved nieces would not do a mean think like that to their kindly (mostly) old unk. So he (I) kept looking. It was folded and tucked away neatly. Neatness is good, but let us not be obsessive. He couldn’t find the dishwashing soap either. Remember Uncle Jim is too grand to eat off paper plates. He would rather wash, dry and put away the dishes than scrape food off paper (gag).
I had better stop writing now. I had not intended to write a novel, but I have run out of things to do so I guess I’ll go home – my other home that is.
Think about it. We Barbara, Trisha & Nellie and spouses are 2nd generation. Our kids, too numerous to mention are 3rd generation, and all the new little ones beginning to show up are the 4th generation. Is that fabulous or what.
Uncle Jim
